on being left behind

i've often wondered why the lives of the people around me seem to have been moving forward, changes and exciting events keep on happening to them and yet none seems to be happening for me...

is it me? or am i just expecting too much on life? i was hoping that by this point in time it would be my turn to tell stories and not remain a listener but the ever listener me just have to contend with the fact that i'll always be like this, being left behind as my friends explore new worlds on their own...

sometimes, i ask myself whether leaving the philippines would be a good idea coz i feel this is not the country for me... maybe if i were in the US i'd have more things to tell and more events happening in my life... come to think of it, my month of stay there had more interesting events than my 21 years in this country... all my friends have exciting things happening to them daily while i don't have much to tell...

now i finally have a break but how will i expect to have exciting things happening to me when i have to work on that f*cking itm project... if i keep on seeing the same people everyday, i'd prolly lose my mind... i need fresh faces, new ones preferably para naman maiba... meeting new people might be my chance to actually have a story to share but how the hell will i meet new people? no chance at all... owelz, 5 months more of this same old same old... maybe by march i'll have a story of my own and not just ride on the stories that happen to my friends....

i jusy don't want to be left behind, that's all...